The gloom of life
by Kiina
Summary: Gone is happiness, and for you to decide if it comes back! Warning: Thougths are depressing and happenings not better so only read if you are sure you wont make suicide afterwards. Thanks.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I don't own Beyblade.

**-The gloom of life-**

Black, dark sky. Clouds. Rain. Cold wet clothes. Raindrops making me shiver. Falling down.

And down.

                  And down.

                                    And down.

                                                      And down.

Wet and heavy. Wet and heavy clothes sticking on my cold skin. Making me shiver, making me feel pain. Old pain. Old scars. Memories of forgotten things. Of long lost dreams. And I ask you why? Look up to the sky. Raindrops falling down. Making me shiver, making me cry. Rain and tears running down my cheek, making me shiver making me try. I notice the river of lies flowing down. Down my cheek, down my live. I wonder how cold live can get. Wonder how cold my tears would get. Wonder, wonder, wonder and cry. Look up to the sky. See the black, black clouds and try. To cry my live away. But the lies stay and my tears are cold. Cold, cold, cold as the rain. Cold, cold, cold as my pain. Cold, cold, cold as my memories. 

Once I asked why. The answer was a lie. That's the reason I cry. The reason I try. To cry it all away so nothing would stay. Nothing would stay….

And I look up the sky and wonder why.

The rain is running down my cheek each drop is just relieve jet nothing but pain is staying. Nobody paying. Even I keep on lying. Even I keep on trying. Even I…

Don't ask why.

I would shatter. Would brake. Fake a smile but inside I would keep on crying. Keep on trying to find an excuse. I know I wont find it. I know I wont. 

And here I stay and pray for you to understand.

Will you ever? Will it end? 

And I feel the wind playing with my hair. I feel the wind playing with my live. Like you did. Without even noticing it. 

I hear whispers.

I hear you.

Even if I know it's true.

That you wont speak to me.

That you left me.

All alone.

I see people passing by.

All alone, all unknown.

Every single breath I take, every single way I went, every single ray sun sends, I will think of you.

And when the time is passing by, you should know I am asking why, constantly asking why, 

you 

        never 

                  said 

                            goodbye.

**********   

Hm…I have no idea what I was writing. Well anyway I will think of a story when you review! Please tell me about whom I should write! I need seriously and drastic help! And at least…8? Reviews?! Is that ok?! Well…I hope it is….

Kiina /6.10.03 


	2. I am dreaming myself to death

I hear my own steps. They are too loud. I know the alleys are not as harmless as they may seem. Funny, remains me of you. But I know I am stupid to keep on thinking about it. I should let you go. 

Yes, I wait, I still wait for your last word. Wait for your good-bye. I wont get it. I know that. But I can still dream. 

I walk as if sleeping, not seeing either side of the street. Missing the low murmurs. Missing the watchful eyes. Not listening, not seeing, missing. All my live I have been missing things. Little, little, little things. Nothing important. Nothing. And yet all these little things made me break. Made me die inside. And dead I am walking through the streets not hearing the whispers not seeing the shadows, at my side. Just walking, walking, walking an endless dream of pain. But I do not say you are the cause of all my misery. I say your missing last words are killing me. And I smile. While walking with open eyes into a trap. Deadly, deadly, deadly trap. Who said it would kill me? I wasn't able to die anyway. Partly because I already was. Maybe because you killed me. Killed, killed, killed me. Dead soul. Dead, dead, dead, I am loosing it!

Someone stepped onto a stone. I heard it. The stone rolled down the dark alley. Down to me. I stared blankly at it. Then I looked up. Not even bothering to wonder if I was in danger. I didn't care. I remember you swear you would stay. Maybe that broke me. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Everything seems slow. Time doesn't count anymore. I see them. Staring at me. As if I was their pray. Briefly I wonder why I think these strange thoughts. 

…But it didn't last.

                  Nothing did.

You didn't say anything. 

                                           I didn't answer.

You didn't.

                                                                                     And I died.

What a pity.


End file.
